Think about it. You are about to leave the house for a few nights’ trip out of town with your bestie and your trusted dog loving housemate is taking care of your pooch. For days before you leave you’re walking around with pictures in your head of your dog abandoned and howling at the door as he smells you disappear into a faraway airport, overpriced coffee in hand. When you look at him you look at him with guilt eyes and as he watches you pack your suitcase you apologise profusely in your I’m-really-letting-you-down-and-I-know-it-and I’m-breaking-my-contract-of-care-for-my-own-selfish-benefit-and-oh-my-goodness-PLEASE-BE-HERE-UNSCATHED-WHEN-I-GET-BACK-AND-ALSO-DON’T-BE-OVERWEIGHT-OR-A-FLEABAG tone and the poor little guy is FEELING all of that!
How often do you examine the way that you communicate with your doggo? Do you think about not just what you are saying, but HOW you are saying it? And do you think that your fearful imaginings go unnoticed, and exist only in the privacy of your own head?
The truth is that over the 14-16 THOUSAND years that domesticated dogs have been around, there have been a schmazillion generations of dogs, each generation living closer and closer to humans, and evolving more and more ways to be our very best friends. Think about the fact that wolves didn’t have eyebrows, and in the process of a dogs’ evolution facial muscle anatomy developed so that they could communicate back to us with a method we use and understand.
And we sit around with a pocket full of biscuits saying ‘Sit Ubu sit!’ thinking that we are the evolved ones, the gracious ones!
These days most guardians expect their dogs to dry tears when their girlfriends break up with them, cuddle them during walk time when they wake up hungover and accept the varying ways that they show up (or don’t) for their dogs on good and bad days. These days dogs go so far as to detect the neurochemistry that precedes epileptic fits, so that they can drag their person to the ground to safely have a fit. They detect sugar slumps for young diabetics and bring them juices to keep them balanced, they listen for deaf people and see for blind people and all the while maintain a faint and heavenly smell of biscuits beneath their paws.
But what are we doing for them?
I am not talking about nice diets and regular walks, I am talking helping them cope with things they find difficult, like us leaving them – however long or short.
What Science Says About How We Speak to Dogs
That sweet AF and very private voice you slip into, the one that feels way too personal to use around other humans? Turns out it’s exactly what your dog needs to hear. Research from the Wolf Science Center analysed 270 training sessions with dogs and wolves, scoring every utterance as “nice” (happy, high-pitched), “neutral,” or “reproachful.” The results were striking: nice tones made tails wag more, kept animals closer to trainers, and crucially, improved performance. Dogs made more correct responses when spoken to warmly. Sharper, reproachful voices did the opposite – fewer tail wags, more distance, and poorer, less predictable compliance.
Check this out though, your voice doesn’t just affect your dog’s mood, it affects their BODY. Scientists at the University of Veterinary Medicine in Vienna (not the sausages) put dogs on pressure-sensing platforms and played recordings of angry and happy human voices. Angry voices caused 30% of dogs to physically destabilise – their bodies literally swayed more.. Your voice reverberates through their entire body.
Here’s some sweet science – who is speaking matters a lot too. A study published in Scientific Reports tested dogs’ ability to locate hidden treats using only voice direction. When owners gave relevant cues (“It’s there! It’s yours!”) in high-pitched tones, dogs chose correctly 60% of the time and responded faster. When unfamiliar experimenters pointed at the correct location? Just 50% – chance level. Dogs aren’t just following instructions; they’re deeply attuned to who is giving them.
The science reveals dogs process both what we say and how we say it. They separate lexical content from acoustic features, meaning they’re not just reading emotion – they’re actually processing information, especially when it is delivered with warmth. Research from the Research Centre for Natural Sciences found dogs responded most successfully when messages combined relevant content with dog-directed intonation from familiar voices.
Context matters. Relationship matters. Tone matters.
So when you’re packing your suitcase, radiating guilt, anxiety and low vibes, your dog isn’t just seeing you leave – they’re hearing it, feeling it and processing every worried syllable.
But remember that’s not all, they’re also feeling your love, your encouragement, your joy. That sick-sweet dog voice of yours? It creates a positive atmosphere that helps them feel safe and improves their ability to learn.
Dogs spent thousands of years evolving to read us, developing physiology that we can read, learning our gestures and properly learning our language. The least we can do is speak to them with kindness and awareness.
Lets also take a hot minute to consider, as an aside, how your anxious behaviour may be reflected in your dogs’ anxious behaviour. How your relaxed behaviour helps them relax. Our dogs follow our lead, even in subtler energetic ways that you might not always think are being noticed because it is not a ‘loud’ communication.
Every word you speak in their presence is felt, understood, and remembered.
The way that you behave is reflected in your dogs’ behaviour.
What you are thinking impacts what they are thinking.
Do better. Work on yourself. Help them!
The Captive Animal Enrichment Project
The CAEP is a non-profit organisation that brings enrichment to captive animals to improve their quality of life. We do this by bringing a variety of relevant natural materials into their enclosures which can relieve boredom, encourage play, facilitate more natural behaviours and give them vital access to medicinal plants from which they can self-select what they require to bring themselves back into balance, as if they were foraging freely.
Our processes are based on cutting-edge research and years of experience in the field. We promote natural health and well-being for animals. Donate or get involved today. Follow us on Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram and X for more insights and information.
